Friday, August 27, 2004

Mr/Ms Right

I couldn’t sleep and it’s 3.17 am!! But I read an interesting article in Cosmopolitan magazine. I copied the article so you can take a look at it; I cancelled 3 traits because I don’t think that they are really important as these 7. Click here for those who wants to read the whole article. Enjoy :)

Are You His Ms. Right?


You've already decided he is the one for you. But have you won his heart yet? Find out here. We simply turned to Lisa Daily, syndicated relationship columnist and author of Stop Getting Dumped, who promises to help readers find and marry "the one" in three years or less. Daily followed her own advice and married her dream man, who proposed at the top of the Eiffel Tower after a six-month courtship. Now, she is determined to help other single gals do the same. A dating guru, Daily interviewed -- and continues to do so -- hundreds of bachelors to find out what makes a woman marriage material in this day and age. Here, Daily dishes about the 10 traits every man is looking for in a serious girlfriend:

7 Traits Men Look for in a Girlfriend:

1. She has a life of her own -- and it's pretty good to boot. Ladies, this means that you take care of yourself, pay attention to your personal style and find time to hang with your fabulous friends and family. You seek adventure by traveling. And you take in life's pleasures -- from indulging in dessert to walking through the park on a sunny day. "You don't expect your boyfriend to be your entire existence," says Daily. In other words, you're not waiting for some man to show up, so you can get your "real life" started.


2. She never makes the first move. This issue has been debated to death, and there is no true consensus. But Daily says that she strongly believes women should never, ever pursue a man. Instead, she suggests waiting for the man to initiate and plan dates. Her reasoning: If the woman is always the one calling, she will never know if he is really interested in her or if it's just convenient for him. She may find herself questioning the relationship every step of the way. Men simply aren't programmed to think like that and therefore are better suited to the chase, Daily says.

3. She does little things to show she cares. Daily has one friend who noticed that her traveling salesman boyfriend never had time to get his shirts washed, so he would just go out and buy new ones. Her friend started to drop off his laundry at the dry cleaners once a week. Daily herself cooks for her husband. "It's as if he doesn't even know where the kitchen is," she says. "But that's not to say that he starves when I'm out of town." No, you do not have to turn into June Cleaver. The bottom line is that you should want to do the little things that let him know you care and you are paying attention to his individual needs. And he should do the same for you. Daily boasts that her man scrapes the ice off her windshield on cold winter mornings!

4. She never turns on the pressure. This one is important. Men have a distinct aversion to any sort of pressure, says Daily. Therefore, women should avoid calling and/or emailing him many times during the day or dropping hints about the future. In fact, keep the dreaded M-word (marriage) out of your vocabulary all together. "Men don't want to constantly take the pulse of a relationship," says Daily. "They would rather just enjoy it."

5. She does not take any crap -- from anyone. A good woman never accepts bad behavior. Guys respect women with whom they can't get away with anything. If he knows there's a penalty -- like getting thrown to the curb -- for a serious violation like cheating, he'll respect you more, and he will be far less likely to do it. You should also never even bother to date married men, those who already have girlfriends or anyone who verbally or physically threatens or abuses you. Period.

6. A good woman always chooses a good man. That means that you should look for someone who is honest and dependable. He has to treat you right. If he says he is going to be somewhere, he is there. Chivalry is not dead, by the way. "Good manners are a deeper window into what kind of man he truly is," Daily says. You should also have compatible views on money (which is the number one thing couples fight about). Even though they say opposites attract, savers should think twice before shacking up with wild spenders.

7. She knows that love is the biggest part of the mating equation. Just how does a good woman know that she has found that crazy-for-you, toe-curling relationship? Daily says that some women have an "a-ha" moment, while love simply sneaks up on the rest. "I believe the feeling includes a unique sense of comfort and acceptance and the feeling that someone else's happiness is as important to you as your own," Daily says. "A certain amount of toe curling is key as well."




2 comments:

nibaq said...

Soooma welcome to the world of blogging. I'll be adding to you to Kuwait Blogs later tonight.

I think if you replace the she with he, and vice versa you get what is needed in a good relationship. Relationships are give and take, and if they are not balanced they never work out.

Couples want to have someone that they can rely on but not be totally dependent on them. You also have to have some initiative in a relationship. No one wants to sit around and just wait for the first move. It gets boring and lonely very quickly. There is also knowing where the line is and not crossing it. We all have our "no go" places that people need to respect and avoid. Also to show that they care about each other and giving acknowledgment to those little things people do for each other. Cause it sucks when you do it and get even a smile in return.

I feel the reason we have such high divorce rates in Kuwait is that couples really dont know each other. They have this puppy love phase that they quickly move to marriage and then things start breaking down, because no real foundation was set. They are suddenly living with someone they really dont know.

SoooMa said...

Thank you nibaq :) Well, I read ur comment and u know what? I totally agree with every single word that u've said.

In my opinion, you can't find a good relationship these days because guys and girls don't think seriously about it. You can't find innocent couples like the ones in old times when they TRUELY love each other. Now, couples just want to have fun and some of them just want to show off infront of thier friends and just want get married as soon as possible.

About the divorce, it's true we have high divorce rates. I think the couples should know each other very well and should be engaged for at least 6 months not less than that so that they won't be shocked after marraige :)